Wow, son. Look at all those stars up there. What a night. I know your old man can be a little silly sometimes—shit, I’ll be the first to admit it. But these nights out on the reservoir with you are some of my favorite moments. I mean, hell, fishing with my son? Can’t think of anything I’d rather do. What a life.

Son, have I ever talked to you about data? Maybe I have, yeah. Well data’s like those stars up there, son. It’s all around us. And as the current of information quickens, our ability to harness it and glean conclusions from it will be one of humanity’s most important responsibilities over the next century. Important as putting enough bait on your rod! Much, much more important, actually.

Whoa, feelin’ a tug there? Well, reel that baby in! You might have a bass chomping on your rod! Reel her in, son, reel her in. Awesome job, bud.

Anyway, a big misconception people have is that data’s clean and easy to work with. I hate to break it to you, but it isn’t. Sometimes sorting through data’s like reeling in a hammerhead shark with a wooden fishing rod. It’s rarely quick and easy. You have to consolidate the data and parse it no matter the volume of data points. Such scalability will only be possible through automation. Machine learning and the like.

Wow, another fish on your rod? Gee. You know what, put your rod down. Let her go. Let’s forget about fishing for a bit. In fact, let’s go home. I have a relational database I want you to see. I think you’re ready. Focus here, son. We’re talking data.


1. Lonely Planet Travel Guides

2. The City of Detroit is Dying, and I Know Why.

3. Door to Door Door Salesman

4. Luck of the Irish

5. No Cure for Lameness

6. Big Cojones

7. Cheese Whiz (hosted by Trent Dilfer)

8. The Giving Boy

9. Fourth Down

10. Horse Grooming

11. Goofus & Gallant

12. Bees

13. Parisian Love

14. Anteaters

15. Andrew Jackson Interview Responses

16. Shisbos™

17. Ransom Note

18. Alumni Message Board

19. Sexual Healing

20. If I were the Mayor

21. Political Cartoons

22. Chunk Tennis

23. Book Review

24. Mom

25. Boats

26. Sister's Shower

27. Cougar Safety

28. Cheat Codes

29. Nancy Reagan’s Spec for The Wire

30. Elevator Man

31. Interns Wanted at L.A. Production Studio

32. Hot Wheels

33. Ice Ice Baby

34. Data

35. Playing Guess Who? with Wayne Gretzky

36. Teddy Bear

37. Carhop

38. DNA Evidence

39. Get Rich Quick Scheme #13

40. Bill Clinton: Daredevil

41. Guide to Guerrilla Marketing

42. If Cain and Abel Were Sisters

43. Consulting Info Session

44. Forgetting the Titans

45. A Mango in Manitoba

46. Euros

47. Fed FAQ

48. Actual Real Life

49. Surviving an Economic Depression

50. Mon French

51. M.C. Escher

52. Budget Cut Speech

53. Alien Invasion

54. Murder on the Big Rock Candy Mountain

55. A Speech for the Student Movement

56. Budget Cut Speech

57. Beans

58. Mick Riddle is a Man Who Works in Tech Support

59. Betty Crocker

60. Good American Dog

61. Get Rich Quick Scheme #38

62. Born Too Late

63. Subway Etiquette

64. Adopt a Child

65. Sex Machine

66. Castro Assassination Attempt

67. Dog

68. Terrorist Search History

69. Image Reinvention

70. Stenographer

71. The Zezk and You

72. A Resolution

73. Beach Bodies

74. Golf Course

75. Renessa

76. Sit-In

77. How to Talk to Humans

78. When I Marched

79. Moonwalk

80. Revolutions That Will Not Be Televised

81. My Rock and Roll Idols

82. More Quotes from Ken Kesey

83. Revolutionary Art

84. Remember the Gophers

85. Africa

86. Economic Terms

87. Best Day of My Life

88. If Cain and Abel Were Sisters

89. Interview Formality