Wow, son. Look at all those stars up there. What a night. I know your old man can be a little silly sometimes—shit, I’ll be the first to admit it. But these nights out on the reservoir with you are some of my favorite moments. I mean, hell, fishing with my son? Can’t think of anything I’d rather do. What a life.

Son, have I ever talked to you about data? Maybe I have, yeah. Well data’s like those stars up there, son. It’s all around us. And as the current of information quickens, our ability to harness it and glean conclusions from it will be one of humanity’s most important responsibilities over the next century. Important as putting enough bait on your rod! Much, much more important, actually.

Whoa, feelin’ a tug there? Well, reel that baby in! You might have a bass chomping on your rod! Reel her in, son, reel her in. Awesome job, bud.

Anyway, a big misconception people have is that data’s clean and easy to work with. I hate to break it to you, but it isn’t. Sometimes sorting through data’s like reeling in a hammerhead shark with a wooden fishing rod. It’s rarely quick and easy. You have to consolidate the data and parse it no matter the volume of data points. Such scalability will only be possible through automation. Machine learning and the like.

Wow, another fish on your rod? Gee. You know what, put your rod down. Let her go. Let’s forget about fishing for a bit. In fact, let’s go home. I have a relational database I want you to see. I think you’re ready. Focus here, son. We’re talking data.

more
STAFF PICKS

1. Lonely Planet Travel Guides

2. The City of Detroit is Dying, and I Know Why.

3. Door to Door Door Salesman

4. Luck of the Irish

5. No Cure for Lameness

6. Big Cojones

7. Cheese Whiz (hosted by Trent Dilfer)

8. Fourth Down

9. The Giving Boy

10. Horse Grooming

11. Goofus & Gallant

12. Bees

13. Parisian Love

14. Anteaters

15. Andrew Jackson Interview Responses

16. Ransom Note

17. Shisbos™

18. Sexual Healing

19. If I were the Mayor

20. Political Cartoons

21. Chunk Tennis

22. Book Review

23. Mom

24. Boats

25. Sister's Shower

26. Cougar Safety

27. Cheat Codes

28. Nancy Reagan’s Spec for The Wire

29. Interns Wanted at L.A. Production Studio

30. Elevator Man

31. Hot Wheels

32. Ice Ice Baby

33. Playing Guess Who? with Wayne Gretzky

34. DNA Evidence

35. Teddy Bear

36. Get Rich Quick Scheme #13

37. Bill Clinton: Daredevil

38. Guide to Guerrilla Marketing

39. Alumni Message Board

40. Consulting Info Session

41. If Cain and Abel Were Sisters

42. Euros

43. Fed FAQ

44. Mon French

45. Actual Real Life

46. Surviving an Economic Depression

47. M.C. Escher

48. Budget Cut Speech

49. A Mango in Manitoba

50. Budget Cut Speech

51. Forgetting the Titans

52. Murder on the Big Rock Candy Mountain

53. Get Rich Quick Scheme #38

54. Beans

55. Betty Crocker

56. Mick Riddle is a Man Who Works in Tech Support

57. Carhop

58. Good American Dog

59. Alien Invasion

60. Dog

61. A Speech for the Student Movement

62. Adopt a Child

63. Sex Machine

64. Born Too Late

65. Subway Etiquette

66. Castro Assassination Attempt

67. Renessa

68. Terrorist Search History

69. Stenographer

70. Image Reinvention

71. Sit-In

72. Beach Bodies

73. A Resolution

74. The Zezk and You

75. When I Marched

76. How to Talk to Humans

77. Revolutions That Will Not Be Televised

78. Golf Course

79. Moonwalk

80. My Rock and Roll Idols

81. More Quotes from Ken Kesey

82. Revolutionary Art

83. Remember the Gophers

84. Data

85. Africa

86. If Cain and Abel Were Sisters

87. Best Day of My Life

88. Interview Formality

89. Economic Terms

SPONSOR