Two British Royal Guards
Hugh: Hey Charles.
Charles: Hey Hugh. How’s your day so far?
Hugh: Humiliating. This morning I was standing extremely still like always when this boy came out of nowhere and…no. It’s too shameful.
Charles: Come on Hugh. No judgment.
Hugh: He got close to my face. He put his face very close to my face.
Charles: Oh my God. Where did you look? Where can you look?
Hugh: First I looked up, then I looked down, and finally I looked toward the horizon with my eyes a little blurry, like it was all a dream.
Charles: What if your eyes had made contact with his as you shifted them? I don’t even think there’s precedence for that.
Hugh: I know. I was shaking the entire time.
Charles: Well, at least you got him to leave.
Hugh: Here’s the thing—he stayed. It was like, shifting my eyes only made me tired.
Charles: Wha—Who is he? Steel Man?
Hugh: Then he started waving his hands around me while chanting, “Made you blink. Made you blink.” All of his friends swarmed around us and started taking pictures. Charles—I couldn’t help it. I blinked. I blinked multiple times.
Charles: I…I don’t know what to say. You did what you could. It’s in the past.
Hugh: What if they come back tomorrow? My eyelids are so sore.
Charles: Next time they come just remind yourself that you have one duty to the Queen, and that is to not acknowledge anyone.
Hugh: Two duties, if you count guarding the palace.
Charles: Right.
