-Hey man, you gonna make it to the barbecue this Saturday?

(Groans) Ughhh I really wish I could, but it’s the wife’s birthday.

-Typical.

-Hmm?

-I just think it’s funny that you took 365 wives, all with different birthdays, and have never once made it to one of my barbecues.

-Now you listen here – I love those women!

-Name them.

-Emma, Olivia, Ava, Isabella, Sophia, Mia, Charlotte, Amelia, Evelyn, Abigail, Harper, Emily, Elizabeth, Avery, Sofia, Ella, Madison, Scarlett, Victoria, Aria, Grace, Chloe, Camila, Pe- nelope, Riley, Layla, Lillian, Nora, Zoey, Mila, Aubrey, Hannah, Lily, Addison, Eleanor, Natalie, Luna, Savannah, Brooklyn, Leah, Zoe, Stella, Hazel, Ellie, Paisley, Audrey, Skylar, Violet, Claire, Bella, Aurora, Lucy, Anna, Samantha, Caroline, Genesis, Aaliyah, Kennedy, Kinsley, Allison, Maya, Sarah, Madelyn, Adeline, Alexa, Ariana, Elena, Gabriella, Naomi, Alice, Sa- die, Hailey, Eva, Emilia, Autumn, Quinn, Nevaeh, Piper, Ruby, Serenity, Willow, Everly, Cora, Kaylee, Lydia, Aubree, Arianna, Eliana, Peyton, Melanie, Gianna, Isabelle, Julia, Valentina, Nova, Clara, Vivian, Reagan, Mackenzie, Madeline, Brielle, Delilah, Isla, Rylee, Katherine, Sophie, Josephine, Ivy, Liliana, Jade, Maria, Taylor, Hadley, Kylie, Emery, Adalynn, Natalia, Annabelle, Faith, Alexandra, Ximena, Ashley, Brianna, Raelynn, Bailey, Mary, Athena, Andrea, Leilani, Jasmine, Lyla, Margaret, Alyssa, Adalyn, Arya, Norah, Khloe, Kayla, Eden, Eliza, Rose, Ariel, Melody, Alexis, Isabel, Sydney, Juliana, Lauren, Iris, Emerson, London, Morgan, Lilly, Charlie, Aliyah, Valeria, Arabella, Sara, Finley, Trinity, Ryleigh, Jordyn, Jocelyn, Kim- berly, Esther, Molly, Valerie, Cecilia, Anastasia, Daisy, Reese, Laila, Mya, Amy, Teagan, Amaya, Elise, Harmony, Paige, Adaline, Fiona, Alaina, Nicole, Genevieve, Lucia, Alina, Mckenzie, Callie, Payton, Eloise, Brooke, Londyn, Mariah, Julianna, Rachel, Daniela, Gracie, Catherine, Angelina, Presley, Josie, Harley, Adelyn, Vanessa, Makayla, Parker, Juliette, Amara, Marley, Lila, Ana, Rowan, Alana, Michelle, Malia, Rebecca, Brooklynn, Brynlee, Summer, Sloane, Leila, Sienna, Adriana, Sawyer, Kendall, Juliet, Destiny, Alayna, Elliana, Diana, Hayden, Ayla, Dakota, Angela, Noelle, Rosalie, Joanna, Jayla, Alivia, Lola, Emersyn, Georgia, Selena, June, Daleyza, Tessa, Maggie, Jessica, Remi, Delaney, Camille, Vivienne, Hope, Mckenna, Gemma, Olive, Alexandria, Blakely, Izabella, Catalina, Raegan, Journee, Gabrielle, Lucille, Ruth, Amiyah, Evangeline, Blake, Thea, Amina, Giselle, Lilah, Melissa, River, Kate, Adelaide, Charlee, Vera, Leia, Gabriela, Zara, Jane, Journey, Elaina, Miriam, Briella, Stephanie, Cali, Ember, Lilliana, Aniyah, Logan, Kamila, Brynn, Ariella, Makenzie, Annie, Mariana, Kali, Haven, Elsie, Nyla, Paris, Lena, Freya, Adelynn, Lyric, Camilla, Sage, Jennifer, Paislee, Talia, Alessandra, Juniper, Fatima, Raelyn, Amira, Arielle, Phoebe, Kinley, Ada, Nina, Ariah, Sa- mara, Myla, Brinley, Cassidy, Maci, Aspen, Allie, Keira, Kaia, Makenna, Amanda, Heaven, Joy, Lia, Madilyn, Gracelyn, Laura, Evelynn, Lexi, Haley, Miranda, Kaitlyn, Daniella, Felicity, Jacqueline, Evie, Angel, Danielle, Ainsley, Dylan, Kiara, Millie, Jordan, Maddison, Rylie, Alicia, Maeve, Margot, Kylee, Phoenix, Heidi, Zuri.

(Smirks) Fine. What are you doing February 29th? I’m having a Leap Day barbecue!

-Damn you.


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