Readers, we would like to retract a statement we made in our most recent issue. After multiple online scientists reached out to us, we now realize it is not factual to state that a squid could “chokeslam any whale, any day, any place and time a squid could body a bitch-ass whale like it’s nobody’s business.” 

It has come to our attention that a squid’s tentacles likely could not wrap around the neck of an adult whale; certainly not with enough force to chokeslam. We’re honestly not sure if whales even have necks, as we’re a magazine about squids. The rest of the magazine was 100% factually accurate and we stand by everything we said about Secretary Clinton’s role in the events that took place in Benghazi. Happy hunting!