Thank you for buying an ArmorSafe bunker! To finish your purchase, please select from the following customization options:

Food

• Dried Beans: 20 Buckets in 4 Flavors (Mesquite, Red, Pinto, “Mystery”) [$750.00]
• Dessert Package: 1,000 Cream Pies [$2,500.00]

Entertainment

• Live Performances From Bippo the ArmorSafe Clown [$20.00]
• Media Player + DVD Box Set (titles include Best of Bippo and Bippo’s Back: Uncut and Censored) [$35.00]
• Bippo’s Mystery Prank [$25.00] [NOTE: must be purchased with the order of 1,000 cream pies]
• A Normal Flower That Bippo’s Wearing That You Should Lean In And Smell [priceless]

Capacity

• 1 person + 1 clown [$200.00]
• 2 people + 1 clown [$275.00]
• 1 family + 1 clown [$500.00]
• 1 person + 1 family of clowns [$10.00 + all the laughs you can handle]

Other

• NO, I don’t want any add-ons [$100,000.00]

• YES, I am sure that I don’t want entertainment even though seeing a delightful clown do tricks and jokes will be a surefire way to lift spirits in a hard time
• YES, I am positive that I don’t not want entertainment
• Ha, you just said you wanted entertainment! Score one for Bippo! I’ll put my clown suit on and see you in the bunker, buddy. I have a back thing so I’m bringing a cot and a humidifier.