Student: Don, man, what’re you doing at our epic party? 

Don Quijote: Ah, you see, I was just stopping by, traveling these long, winding roads. 

Student: That’s awesome. How did you get in though? This is the coolest fraternity on campus, and you’re not a woman. 

Don Quijote: As I passed this manor, I saw a towering figure standing out back, and a chill ran down my spine. Good sir, your feast hosts an evil giant, and I am here to slay it!

Student: What do you.. oh, wait. Yo, Ethan, is that big windmill still out back?

Ethan: (From off in the distance) Yeah dude, we need it for threshing grain.

Student: Sorry Don, we need it for threshing grain. You can’t come in. Either way, we only allow college undergrads and girls from the neighboring high school. 

Don Quijote: A student, me? Oh no, son. I am a man. A man who has seen giants, dragons, the knights of old made real in the corporeal world. I have seen things beyond your imaginings.

Student: (Whispers) It’s nothing personal. We just can’t have people thinking we let men into our parties. We don’t. (Loudly) We don’t let men into our parties. 

Don Quijote: Advance, men, into this abode! Fret not, fair maidens, I shall save thee! I am Don Quijote de La Mancha!

Student: I know you’re trying to screw with the ratio, Don. No one’s buying this.  

Don Quijote: Alas. Can I at least stay until the end of the song?