Last Names A- Y: Harding Room 2121
Last Name Zanderson: Arrive at the boarded up Liquor-Max on Washington at 2 am sharp. Sometime before sunrise a man will meet you there. He will proceed to punch you repeatedly. This man is not affiliated with the course but you should tip him your wallet for his trouble.
Another man will shake you back to consciousness at around 2 pm. He will punch you once, but that&rsquo;s just his style, no need to tip him. He&rsquo;ll drive you to a gas station. There he will sell the rest of the gas in the van.
Once you&rsquo;ve pushed it through a few States (bring quarters for tolls) the man&rsquo;s gonna slam on the brakes with, at most, zero warning. Get up quickly. You&rsquo;re already late for your test.
If you listen closely you should hear an ear piercing cougar scream fifteen feet to your left.&nbsp; Run quickly and you should see a testing center. Take a sharp right at the testing center and you&rsquo;ll find a small very small cave entrance and a Ziploc full of peanut oil.
In that cave you&rsquo;ll find many lepers. One of those lepers is contagious, and it&rsquo;s not your job to figure out which. The lepers will ask you three riddles. For each you get wrong they&rsquo;ll be noticeably disappointed, and then I&rsquo;m gonna have to hear about it. You do not want me to have to hear about it.
If you get all three riddles correct, you should have about 35 seconds to take the exam. The lepers will provide you with a pencil and chewing gum. The questions are all true/false and exactly the same, &ldquo;This statement is false.&rdquo; Think quickly, there&rsquo;s 15,000 of them.
When you&rsquo;ve finished the exam tie it to the weather balloon waiting outside the cave. If you make a fitting offering to the Lepers&rsquo; wind god, she will see fit to deliver the exam to my door. Otherwise I&rsquo;ll have no choice but to assume you cheated.
Last Names Zat &ndash; Zul: Harding 2121

Last Names A- Y: Harding Room 2121
Last Name Zanderson: Arrive at the boarded up Liquor-Max on Wash...

Exam Locations

Wendy Perkins is the hottest girl in the 7th grade.
She reads at a 6th grade level, but her body is at a 9th grade level. She wears her mom&rsquo;s makeup, her sister&rsquo;s bras, and her daddy&rsquo;s suspenders to school every day. She smokes cigarettes in the girls&rsquo; room to stay thin and vapes VS body spray in the boys&rsquo; room as a feminist statement.
All the other girls spread rumours about her. Partly because they&rsquo;re jealous that Justice pays her to shoplift there and partly because she&rsquo;s aggressively pro-Israel. I spread rumors about her in the hopes that she&rsquo;ll hear and ask me to stop.
She doesn&rsquo;t even have to sleep with the teachers to get straight A&rsquo;s. She just walks in, bats her eyelashes, and proceeds to pay attention during class and study really hard at home. I have to sleep with the teachers for them to learn my name.
Last week she told Tim Taylor that she liked his shirt and he drove his mom&rsquo;s Suburban into their house. The week before that she dropped a weight on Mark Holdren&rsquo;s foot and he kept the toe even though they could&rsquo;ve reattached it. I hurt myself in front of a webcam so I can wire her $800 every Sunday.
Yesterday we had a field trip where everyone just stared at her from behind a velvet rope for six hours. Half the parents wouldn&rsquo;t sign permission slips because so many kids got heatstroke last time. The other half came as chaperones.
She&rsquo;s my dream girl, but who am I kidding, a girl like Wendy Perkins would never go for a guy like me. She&rsquo;s beautiful, smart, cool, and I&rsquo;m just a boring old gym teacher.

Wendy Perkins is the hottest girl in the 7th grade.
She reads at a 6th grade level, but her body is...

Middle School Beauty

&ndash; We&rsquo;re in KidLand! ClapClapClap Having fun with the Kidman! ClapClapClap That&rsquo;s me!
&ndash; You can come too! ClapClapClap but first, you know what you gotta do! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Ya gotta get mommy&rsquo;s purse! ClapClapClap Gotta grab some cash! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Now find Daddy&rsquo;s keys! ClapClapClap Driving&rsquo;s easy as 1-2-3! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Now listen to me! ClapClapClap Drive the cash to the church of Scien-tol-o-gy! ClapClapClap
&ndash; And when you get home, ClapClapClap Just pick up the phone. ClapClapClap
&ndash; Press six three times SixSixSix Hear that voice on the line? SixSixSix
&ndash; You gotta listen to the voice ClapClapClap Gotta kill your parents! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Gotta speak the evil oath ClapClapClap And kill those parents! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Uh oh kids! What&rsquo;s that noise? It sounds like the alarm for a SURPRISE DANCE PARTY!
&ndash; Look it&rsquo;s Snuggle Wubble! He&rsquo;s doing the snuggle worm! Can you do the snuggle worm kids?
&ndash; Now, Snuggles and me ClapClapClap we&rsquo;ll keep dancing while you do the deed. ClapClapClap
&ndash; &hellip;
&ndash; Yeah Snuggles baby, shake that thi &ndash; Oh great you&rsquo;re back!
&ndash; And now that it&rsquo;s done ClapClapClap We can really have some fun ClapClapClap
&ndash; Come to Kidland with me! ClapClapClap Just jump right in to your TV! ClapClapClap
&ndash; Don&rsquo;t be shy.&nbsp; ClapClapClap Don&rsquo;t try to hide.&nbsp; ClapClapClap&nbsp; Kidman hates kids who lie!
&ndash; Kidman&rsquo;s gonna count to 3 ClapClapClap Then you&rsquo;ll jump in here with me! ClapClapClap
&ndash; One. ClapClapClap Two. ClapClapClap THREE!
&ndash; It didn&rsquo;t work! Surprised? Don&rsquo;t be! ClapClapClap It&rsquo;s simple science you see! ClapClapClap
&ndash; A television works ClapClapClap By decoding signals from around the earth ClapClapClap
&ndash; You can&rsquo;t jump in a video!&nbsp; ClapClapClap This was recorded three days ago ClapClapClap&ndash; So kids, that&rsquo;s our lesson for today ClapClapClap A TV only works one way! ClapClapClap

– We’re in KidLand! ClapClapClap Having fun with the Kidman! ClapClapClap That’s me!
– You can come...

Discovery Kids Pilot Episode

Welcome to my zen meditation studio, kemosabe. Now get those clothes off and get on the table, the secrets of the universe wait for no man.
Close your eyes and hold your breath, imagine yourself zooming out. Out of your body, out of this building. Stop! Can you see it? If you kinda squint the lake looks like a lady&rsquo;s bare chest from here. Pretty neat huh? Sometimes those swans float over the middle and look like nipples.
Now zoom back in. Further. Further. Look! You can see under your own skin.&nbsp; Could you imagine if we all walked around skinless like that? Like hey, wanna shake hands with our raw meat hands and get each other all bloody? We&rsquo;re so lucky we have skin.
I don&rsquo;t have skin. That&rsquo;s ok though. Keep zooming out. Zoom out until the earth is just a pale blue dot, like the tip of a ball point pen. You should feel the pen rolling over your whole body, making a dotted line at your loins and your trimming points.
Zoom out further. Stop! It&rsquo;s Uranus. What a fun name for a planet. Imagine if I poked your bottom right there as I said that, how funny that&rsquo;d be. I&rsquo;d never do that though. The skin is the body&rsquo;s natural barrier against infection. I lost my skin last Thursday.
Let&rsquo;s just zoom out a little further now. Over there is Orion&rsquo;s Belt. Look how beautiful, look at the stars. From here don&rsquo;t they almost spell out &ldquo;cut along the dotted line&rdquo;. Remember the pen. Feel the pen against your supple skin.
And zoom out a little bit further you&rsquo;ll see a dark nebula, the birthplace of our own sun and thousands more. Feel that rumbling. Like an electric razor shaving your entire body isn&rsquo;t it?
From this distance the earth is a microscopic marble. Skin, no skin. Shaved, bleeding onto the floor. We&rsquo;re all just little monkeys floating around on some space dust. And don&rsquo;t those monkeys look like a Skin-Changer 3000? Don&rsquo;t you want to go in the Skin-Changer with me?&nbsp;
Well sorry to break it to you pal, but there&rsquo;s no such thing as a Skin-Changer. Let alone 3000 such things. But we can dream, my friend. Please keep the lights off when you leave. They hurt my sinews.

Welcome to my zen meditation studio, kemosabe. Now get those clothes off and get on the table, the s...

Matthew Sciamanna.css-1xlpnei{margin:0px -15px 0px 6px;width:11px;vertical-align:-14px;}

Matthew Sciamanna