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Artwork: SKL '23
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Barbershop Quartet

Author: ZDG '20
As seen in: Nantucket Sleighride #

Lead: Fellas, meet the new fifth member of our quartet–Tom!

Bass: Swell to meet ya Tom!

Baritone: Tom, eh? That’s my kid brother’s name! Glad to have you!

Tenor: Does anyone else think this is fucked? 

Tom: A quartet? I’m game!

Tenor: No chance we could pull this off with five. 

Lead: Say, last I checked five was better than four! Who’s with me?

All except Tenor: Yessir!

Tom: Quartet for life!

Tenor: We can’t do a quartet with five people. Every song we sing has four very specific parts.

Tom: If you keep this glass half empty attitude up I might just slam your ass, buster.

Lead: Yeah, what’s with being a negative nancy all of a sudden? Keep it up and I’ll have to stomp your ass.

Bass: A five person quartet? I’ll give it a shot!

Baritone: Next person to say something pessimistic is getting pounded.

Lead: Let’s be clear. If you’re being negative you’ve bought yourself a one way ticket to Pound Town.

Tom: Boys, if you can dream it, you can sing it! Don’t let this jerk get to your heads. Let’s rock their socks off!

Lead: Hands in for Tom!