- Yeah, I had a grandpa too once. Is yours cool or like a piece of shit or do you like hate him or what? Aw, I’m so sorry he passed.
- Maybe a romantic dinner would cheer you up? No? Oh ok.
- Well if I was your grandpa I would never die. I would stay alive forever so you wouldn’t have to be sad.
- You would like that, right? If I was your grandpa? You could, like, visit me in the nursing home and we could play checkers together.
- I saw that family reunion you guys had in Wisconsin, bet it was pretty cold. We could share a blanket, after your parents and the twins fall asleep. Maybe make out if the moment was right.
- Stop saying it would be weird. It wouldn't be weird, I would still look like me, I wouldn’t be old. You’re making it weird.
- No, I would still be your granddad. I don’t think you understand. The whole idea was that I would be your granddad and not die, so yes I would still be him but we could still go out. It’s--no--you’re still not getting it! It’s not weird it’s really romantic, I’m being really romantic, so….oh….I see.
- I get the problem….grandpa is married. You’re right, that’d be messed up.
- Maybe….grandma was dead, so that I was single, and then we could be a thing?
- Ok, awesome! Pick you up tomorrow at noon then?
- Oh, right, the wake. Maybe Saturday would be better.
