Artwork: ghost

Exam Locations

Author: MJS '19
As seen in: Seasons of Life

Last Names A- Y: Harding Room 2121

Last Name Zanderson: Arrive at the boarded up Liquor-Max on Washington at 2 am sharp. Sometime before sunrise a man will meet you there. He will proceed to punch you repeatedly. This man is not affiliated with the course but you should tip him your wallet for his trouble.

Another man will shake you back to consciousness at around 2 pm. He will punch you once, but that’s just his style, no need to tip him. He’ll drive you to a gas station. There he will sell the rest of the gas in the van.

Once you’ve pushed it through a few States (bring quarters for tolls) the man’s gonna slam on the brakes with, at most, zero warning. Get up quickly. You’re already late for your test.

If you listen closely you should hear an ear piercing cougar scream fifteen feet to your left.  Run quickly and you should see a testing center. Take a sharp right at the testing center and you’ll find a small very small cave entrance and a Ziploc full of peanut oil.

In that cave you’ll find many lepers. One of those lepers is contagious, and it’s not your job to figure out which. The lepers will ask you three riddles. For each you get wrong they’ll be noticeably disappointed, and then I’m gonna have to hear about it. You do not want me to have to hear about it.

If you get all three riddles correct, you should have about 35 seconds to take the exam. The lepers will provide you with a pencil and chewing gum. The questions are all true/false and exactly the same, “This statement is false.” Think quickly, there’s 15,000 of them.

When you’ve finished the exam tie it to the weather balloon waiting outside the cave. If you make a fitting offering to the Lepers’ wind god, she will see fit to deliver the exam to my door. Otherwise I’ll have no choice but to assume you cheated.

Last Names Zat – Zul: Harding 2121