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Pieces

Bob Golf
27
JKF '25   •   May 2023
“How was your summer, Bob Golf?” chuckles the hottest guy in school. I like to stand be…
Wheel of Fortune
11
MFP '23-24   •   December 2022
Contestant #1: I’d like to solve the puzzle: Host: Go right ahead. _’D   L_KE &n…
DrivingInstructor.ai
111
EB '24   •   May 2022
I get in the car, and I’m doing everything by the book. I’m checking my mirrors, both h…
Snails Need Love Too
ZDG '20   •   November 2019
A darkly handsome bladesman stood at the edge of the clearing. I didn’t recognize him, but hi…
Last Day at the Zoo
17
NSG '20-'22   •   December 2020
After serving as head zookeeper for 25 years and chief hunting assistant during a disastrous week-l…
thegreatcoming2000.blogspot.com
26
GPCP '22   •   May 2022
January 2, 2000I know, I know, elephant in the room. I said the world was going to end at the dawn …
Shark Tank U.S.S.R
39
PKS '21-'22   •   October 2020
Host: Welcome to Shark Tank USSR.  Alexei: Privet, sharks. Today I am asking for 0 rubles in …
Ghost Hunters
42
MMM '20   •   December 2020
School’s out, plan is a go.  It’s officially Halloween.  My parents think I&r…
If Money Grew On Trees
27
SAB '24   •  
- Environmental protection would be bipartisan. - In the fall, you could substitute real money wit…
Heaven
93
CLC '22-'23   •   December 2022
– And the last thing is that the Build-A-Bear is closed Sundays, so you’ll want to plan…
Therapy
71
OMA '24   •   January 2022
Okay, Nathan. Now tell me what you see in this picture.  That’s a headshot of you, bu…
City Nights, 3029
20
GPCP '22   •   May 2022
It’s Saturday night, and I’m looking for trouble. Shades. Scowl. Leather jacket in all …
There’s No More Gazpacho In The Cupboard
11
MMM '20   •   October 2020
– What? – There’s no more cans of gazpacho in our cupboard. The hell am I suppos…
Strange Position
12
SAB '24   •  
Alright Officer, so there I am walking down Main Street with my groceries when I see this guy layin…
Trying To Write Mental Health Pieces When Your Mental Health Is Pretty Okay At The Moment
197
GPCP '22   •   January 2022
You close your laptop, wishing you had something real to write about. The first three pieces about …
Cool Kevin
5
MAG '21-'22   •   December 2021
Cool Kevin is a man the military pays to come to our office and yell at us about not smoking mariju…
Laser Danger
20
MAG '21-'22   •   January 2022
Before dying of liver failure, action stuntman Laser Danger said some of the coolest things utter…
Bad Days
15
MAG '21-'22   •   October 2020
– When Dad broke out of jail and decided to hold his second family hostage instead of ours. …
E=mcBUTT
10
MMM '20   •   February 2020
sigh No, Percival, it does not. But due to your father’s generous donation, I am… plea…
Surf Trip
37
HJH '19   •   December 2020
I’ll never forget the summer I road-tripped to Hawaii with my two best friends. While it star…