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Pieces

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Measuring the Length of my Penis
26
February 2020
*mmmm* ..    (the tip of my penis extends to the 4 inch mark)    “mmm…
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Frat Boy
39
December 2021
There’s nothing cooler than being a frat boy.  Picture this. I’m sitting on the f…
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Discovery Kids Pilot Episode
July 2018
– We’re in KidLand! ClapClapClap Having fun with the Kidman! ClapClapClap That’s …
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2019 World Expo
1
March 2019
– Attention please, the presentation by Tajikistan will begin in 5 minutes. – (20 minu…
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Late
186
January 2022
I look down at the watch tattooed on my wrist. It’s 10:00. Fuck. I look up at my wall clock t…
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Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me
10
September 2020
Peter Sagal: Thaaaanks Bill, it’s the week between Christmas and new years and we here at Wai…
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Cruising Altitude
1
September 2021
Good evening passengers, this is your doctor speaking. Yeah, you heard that right. Everybody know…
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Texting on My Laptop
9
February 2019
Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Sarah, sorry.  Me: I didn’t realize hitt…
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Femme Fatale
15
October 2020
She walks into the room and grabs my attention. Or maybe she grabs my hand. I’m shaking now. …
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Exam Locations
6
May 2018
Last Names A- Y: Harding Room 2121 Last Name Zanderson: Arrive at the boarded up Liquor-Max on Was…
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Churchill
11
July 2021
Winston Churchill, known for all of his political and military accomplishments, was also a Nobel Pr…
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Obituary
12
July 2021
If you would’ve told me yesterday that I’d be writing an obituary for the guy in this…
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Algorithms
7
January 2020
Algorithms are all around us. You might not see or hear them, but they are present. They are there …
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The Guys Who Invented Ping Pong
10
July 2021
GUY 1: Check this out…(opens up the game PONG on Atari)GUY 2: Woah! (plays PONG)GUY 1: If on…
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Funding Needed for Life-Saving Surgery
175
May 2022
(二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二)$0 raised out of $50000 Please donate to my life-saving surgery. I cannot …
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Business Presentation
1
June 2018
ME: And by subverting double axial capital inflows we can mobilize revenue twice as fast. SMITH: I…