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Pieces

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Larry’s Donation
February 2020
Larry inhaled for a second, let the shivers pass, and proceeded to wipe the spunk off the glossy ma…
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Package Delivery FAQ
16
Q: I had issues receiving the correct product. What should I do? A: Name which of the following sc…
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The Flu Game
10
May 2021
And Jordan moves left… Spins around Stockton… Wretches nine times and DRAINS the mid-…
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A Day in the Life of Hamish Olsen, New York, 19
44
December 2020
She looked at him like a deer in headlights might look at someone if it had human eyes. Hamish had …
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My Speech For Tonight
9
October 2008
Hi everyone. I’m Jess’s father. Thank you all for coming to Jess’s sweet sixteen.…
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TV Show Taglines
October 2019
-Babies vs. Cars: Will the underdog keep losing? -A car? Versus a baby? -This baby specifically d…
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Things To Say If You Want To Join The Cool Table
22
December 2021
Don’t mind me, lemme pull up a chair—backwards. My mom packs me lemon slices instead…
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Teacher’s Note
20
July 2021
Dear Parent, If you are receiving this note it means that your child has been enrolled in my class…
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Dialogue Options in Fallout: New Cambridge
66
May 2022
Stranger: Hey there traveler! Is there anything I can help you with?   [1] I’m very hu…
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Morning Routine
15
December 2020
8:00am – Wake up and shower. This is easy if you sleep in the shower. 11:30am – Put so…
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Judge, Jury, and Executioner
2
December 2020
…and now that I’ve got you, I’ll be your judge, jury, and executioner. Wait, …
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Larry was there.
October 2020
Larry was there. Larry saw the flashes as the troposphere lit on fire, the sounds the bombs made as…
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The Talk Throughout History
10
November 2020
Eve: I think that’s the wrong hole.Adam: Again?? I really wish we had parents to sit us down …
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Barbershop Quartet
January 2020
Lead: Fellas, meet the new fifth member of our quartet–Tom! Bass: Swell to meet ya Tom! Bar…
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QUEER ON THE FRONTIER
8
October 2020
Host: Hello and welcome back to Queer on the Frontier: the show that examines cultural representati…
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Ashes
1
March 2019
-Well hereeeee you go Mrs. Johnson — your very own son’s ashes. -Why, doctor, these as…
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King of Smooth
35
December 2021
You’re down in the dumps, sad about your boyfriend leaving you for a prettier, more confident…
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Cowboy Fantasies
4
March 2020
“I’ve been having cowboy fantasies again,” I mumble, before kicking through the s…
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An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
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Safari
1
September 2020
“And here you’ll see the world’s fastest animal, the cheetah. A beautiful example…