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Pieces

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Amnesia
October 2019
– John? I mean uh, excuse me random stranger? – What do you want? – I have amne…
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Elvis Has Left the Building
1
Robert Carlock '95
November 2020
ANNOUNCER: “Elvis has left the building!” TEENAGE FANS: “(Scream)!” ANNOU…
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Inventing the Wheel
8
July 2021
Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you… the wheel! (Roaring applause) Just what exac…
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Hit, That, Button
10
October 2018
“How you folks doin tonight!?” Wooot, wooooooot! “Coming at you from the city o…
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Answering Machine
October 2020
– (pickup) Hello? – Doc?! Is that you? It’s Billy.  – The Doctor is …
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Two Bailiffs Talk Before Court Starts
10
October 2018
– First day, huh. Nervous? I know I was. – No. I have everything set up. I prepared th…
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Inspired Musings
December 2020
Scientists say that the murder rate goes up when there is a full moon. But so does the rate of peop…
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Excerpts From the Great American Novel
74
February 2020
It was time for them to head west with just the shirts on their backs and the shirts on their legs.…
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Safari
September 2020
“And here you’ll see the world’s fastest animal, the cheetah. A beautiful example…
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Mall Santa
18
October 2020
Beep. Beep. Beep. 5:15 AM. I sigh. I brew my morning coffee and catch up on the news — just …
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Larry’s Donation
February 2020
Larry inhaled for a second, let the shivers pass, and proceeded to wipe the spunk off the glossy ma…
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One Man Car Wash
June 2020
– (standing on street corner with buckets of water, some rags, and a ‘Car Wash’ s…
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Good Cop, Bad Cop, Jelly-Donut Cop
10
December 2020
Bad Cop: We have your fingerprints on the gun, the doorknob, and the victim, punk. Good Cop: Hey j…
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Cruising Altitude
September 2021
Good evening passengers, this is your doctor speaking. Yeah, you heard that right. Everybody know…
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Film Noir
December 2020
The year was December 17th, winter to be exact. Outside my office it was a wet, dark afternoon&mdas…
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My Anime Fanfiction
3
November 2020
You wake up in your high school dorm. Umaru-chan, your roommate / stepsister who is also your girlf…
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How Cancer Eventually Got Cured
9
July 2021
Before you say anything, we know what you’re thinking: why should you care that cancer eventu…
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Tech Support Chat
October 2020
– Hey is this the–uh–the Niteflirt phone sex line? – No, sorry, this is th…
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The Time I Got Caught Milking
10
February 2020
One time I was at the farm, milking some cows when Bobby, the guy that owns the farm, comes out run…
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Mr. Worldwide
26
December 2020
Pitbull’s plane touches down at Miami International Airport at 12:43 on a Tuesday. He’s…