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Home
About
Read
Pieces
Magazines
Books
Comp
Masthead
Contact
Home
About
Read
Pieces
Magazines
Books
Comp
Masthead
Contact
Pieces
Last Day at the Zoo
6
NSG '20-'22
December 2020
After serving as head zookeeper for 25 years and chief hunting assistant during a disastrous week-l…
Dinner Date
BGS '22-'23
November 2020
Lindsey: It is so hot that you speak French, Jack.Jack: Ah, but how else would I order . . . la cr&…
Vanitas
51
YMC '21-'22
March 2022
On the first day, God created the heavens and the earth. "Let there be light," He said, and there w…
One Man Car Wash
HJH '19
June 2020
– (standing on street corner with buckets of water, some rags, and a ‘Car Wash’ s…
2020 International Video Game Awards Acceptance Speech
JLG '21
October 2020
Oh, thank you, really thank you so much. This award…it truly means so much to me. Well, it l…
My First Kiss
10
JPW '21
September 2020
I pick up this girl Julia in my car, and I’m doing 90 on Lincoln Avenue, you know, batting ma…
Dear President
16
HJH '19
October 2019
Dear President, My name is Bradley and I am 8. I’m from Ohio and my mom won’t let me p…
Street Fight
MAG '21-'22
October 2020
Biker #1: You shouldn’t have knocked that drink out of my hand in there. Now you’re gon…
Elvis Has Left the Building
Robert Carlock '95
November 2020
ANNOUNCER: “Elvis has left the building!” TEENAGE FANS: “(Scream)!” ANNOU…
How McDonalds Came Up With Grimace
21
JRD '22-'23
May 2021
Businessman: As I was saying, what do kids love? Characters! We just ran with that. Businesswoman:…
Fire Department Tour
10
SWR '19-'20
March 2020
Fire Chief: And this here’s where we do our laundry—(alarm goes off) Oof, sorry kids, t…
Kashan Rugs
1
EAH
May 2022
My Piece About What It Would Be Like If I Wrote A Piece for the FYC #
CDL '21
October 2020
– What started out as a frankly disgusting case of unbelievable obesity had snowballed into a…
Middle School Beauty
MJS '19
June 2018
Wendy Perkins is the hottest girl in the 7th grade. She reads at a 6th grade level, but her body i…
My Fairy
TAF '19
December 2020
Some people have a fairy godmother. Klugg is my swamp monster god-uncle. Klugg can’t fly lik…
BMW
EB '24
May 2022
How Cancer Eventually Got Cured
9
YMC '21-'22
July 2021
Before you say anything, we know what you’re thinking: why should you care that cancer eventu…
President Nice Guy
14
HFJ '18
December 2020
Richard Holton, our first Nice Guy president, eased out of the womb on December 24, 1921, giving do…
An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
MFP '23-24
May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
No More Sheriffs
1
JFAR '19-'22
May 2018
Happy Saturday everyone – good to see you at the town meeting. All our sheriffs died last nig…
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